no motivation/I needa cheer upp~

I just feel so tired and laggy today uhh~ maybe its because I need more sleep, since I have not been sleeping well :( anyways, I just dunno what's wrong with me these days… Totally no motivation to do stuff and also feeling super down for no reason -.- so I decided to do this random post and upload some cute-sy pictures! :)

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school life…

I know a lot of people would say that all students should be very happy that they don't need to work and worry about their life expenses since everything is being taken care of and looked out for... But I think that's so not true uhh... :( we students also got a lot to worry about ehh; our grades, our 'image' our social life, our friends, our parents, etc…

The thing is that I'm so super sick of hearing adults tell me that I should treasure my life as a student now and how they wish that they can go back to the school and continue studying again, blah blah blah~ I mean like I understand that students do indeed have lesser stress ansld things to worry about, but it doesn't mean that our lives are worry-free uhh. Most adults think that students should not wprry about how how they look or how they dress up, they shouldn't need to wprry about relationships and how others look at them. But that is so not true, cause since almost everyone likes to fit into the 'in' crowd and not get octrasised, everyone wants to look good and make all the 'cool' friends, buy and use all the 'cool' things, we all wanna appear good~ adults think that teenagers like me shouldn't worry about our 'image' and just concentrate on studying. Don't care about peer pressure. But the truth is that most of us do care how people look at us, we do give a damn about our looks, our bags, our hair and even what type of friends we have, we can hardly ignore all those comments made by others about ourselves. I know it sounds super easy to ignore insults that other throw at you daily, but when you really expierence it, you will know how venomous it can get. From spreading false rumors about you to bitching about you in front of your face, yea, I have basically expierenced it all.

I mean like I know it is kinda harder for me to fit into the crowd since I'm a girl that don't think like one... +.+ I'm a tomboy since primary school, I don't like dresses, I don like to wear skirts, I'm super violent and much stronger than an average girl~ also, I have somewhat a short temper and also, most importantly, I do not have a sexy figure or even a pretty little face that all guys think girls shpuld have~ since primary school, I have been withstanding all these insults and teasing or whatnots. So I'm kinda used to it... But when I went to secondary school, peer pressure became so much higher -.- I afmit that I tried damn fu*king hard to fit into the 'in' crowd when I just entered sec 1; short skirts, fringe, cool bags, etcetc~ trust me, I tried so damn hard. In the end, I got sick and tired of trying to keep up with the trends, so I quit.

I had conflicting ideas with some people (the 'in' people) and in the end, they decided to start bitching about me. I mean like I don't mind at first, but slowly, I got affected uhh x.x when I was in sec 3, things got much better, but in my class there are still people that will come up with sone terms to.insult me cause I'm violent and not girly. Well, its still going on~ -.- but yea, my point is that although you might always get insulted and affected by some no-life people, you should just ignore them, sounds super difficult but its wprth it when they finally give up and shut up. :) i think that I'm super lucky cause although I was 'bashed' in both my primary and secondary school, I still manage to find true friends that stuck by my admist all the drama, in both schools~ a big THANK YOU to these awesome and precious friends, you all are truely th BEST~! :'D

And to those parents out there, please stop thinking that a teenager's life is so simple anymore, we endure the same shit as you do everyday, so yea, stop critisising us for being too ' complicated' and complex. We do have our reasons~

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update~ :)

yea, i m sorry for being a lazy blogger :P terrible terrible me~ >< anyways, i have been quite busy recently uhh~ so dont really have time to update, and also since i m usually lazy and not hardworking enough to update my blog, i didn't update much XP thank you to any reader somewhere out there uhh~ XD me love you so much~ :)

anyways, since i am doing and rushing my portfolio lately (yea, even for a subject like 3D animation, you nedd to do a freaking portfolio -.-), i totally treasure every single one of my breaks and would try my best to read my fanfics~ dont bash me just because i read fanfics k~ they are nice and i think everyone has the rights to imagine herself meeting up or have relations to someone that she idolises over uhh, eg. kpop~ <3 ^^ yepp, i kinda crazy laa, but still, being able to imagine yourself to be someone that can be noticed by any kpop star, i would be damn happy laa.... so, every now and then, i would indulge myself in another dimension~ *dreamy dreamy* ^w^ ok, back to topic~ so i have been saying that i have been rushing through my portfolio recently because i gotta hand in some of the work as part of a CA... so i have been feeling like this:

and looking like this:

so, i here by apologise to all people that i might have offended :<

OH, btw, today is 2 of my darling 'daughters's birthday~! ^^

HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY MY DARLING DAUGHTERS YIFANG AND PEISHAN~!!!!!!!!!!!! ^^

reunion dinner - part 2

Anyways, as i was saying from the previous post about how unhappy i m to have to eat reunion dinner with cheapskates, i would like to mention that that night when i had my reunion dinner, i was damn pissed :<

my dad has 4 siblings, he is th eldest. i was already unhappy aat the fact that my family was the one buying most of the ingredients for the steamboat, providing the place and all, my dad's younger sister provided puzzle games while his younger brother provided one steamboat pot and some ingredients too. however, much to my disgust, his youngest sisterr not only did not come with anything, but she was the one that went home with most of the left over ingredients. -.- i mean like i m not stingy with the leftovers or what laa [ btw, there were alot of unopened packs of food that are still so damn fresh ._. ] but then horh, u came with nothing and when people give you things then you should accept it graciously laa, still so picky when you obviously want those stuff... *\._./*

ok, enough with those rants and complains... anyways although reunion dinners might be someimes troublesome, it iz indeed a good way to come together as a big family and talk and eat, not to forget, have fun~! :D

short post laa, but now common tests lehh, need to study ehh~ aiya i never study one laa :P till next time~! ^^
p.s. thank you for all the readers~! :D <3 you all! ^^

reunion dinner - part 1

hey ppl~ i know it is a little early to start talking about eating the new year's reunion dinner… but well, myrelatives and my family both have conflicting schedules, so, we always have reunion dinners earlier~

kinda rude to say this, but whenever it comes to reunion dinners, i can always see the ugly side to some of my relatives... since now they are all outside eatimg and enjoying themselves, i can see a few obvious types of people standing out:
1) the typical kiasu singaporean; thinking since it is practically free food, then mist 'kope' the most expensive type of food tp eat, steamboat mahh, just throw everything down!!
2) the starved ones; obviously hungry since their bowl can be filled to the brim and they are still taking more food, sometimes, they look like those 'hungry ghosts'

k, i shall blig latr, the smell of food reaching me le~

(to be continued~) ;D

my screwed up luck with 'l-o-v-e'

yea, title says it all~ kinda feeling low at the moment, so decided to blog about it~ i know there are alot of benifitsof being single, well, i don't mind about my relationship status at all, but its just that, sometimes, well i see cute couples on the streets being so nice to each other, i kinda feel a pang of emptiness inside me... TnT well, i m damn aware that i don't have a nice sexy body or a very pretty face to get any guy interested in me. yea, i m not those girl-y girls either... i don't wear dresses, skirts [school skirt excluded], short revealing stuff... i m plain, yes i know~ that's why i never got into the mindset that i will have a prince charming to come and sweep me off my feet~ but, yea, i m a girl too, i do have crushes >.<

i should state first that i do not have any expectations that any one of my cruses would like me back~ i know my limits perfectly well uhh~ but the point is that, whenever i got a crush, and when i tell some of my friends, some of them will keep it to themselves, while there are also very big mouth-ed ones that would not hesitate to make that the news headlines for tomorrow's newspaper... over the years, i have gotten used to the fact that people do spread rumors and many accept them... yes, i have also been the victim of plenty of rumors~ numb le~ *\(-.-)/*

yes, whenever i tell myself that it is useless to crush on someone because they will never like me back... but sometimes, i just cant help it uhh, so, happy to say that i have just gotten over my longest crush!! ^w^  so yea, although it took long enough, i still gotten over it~ guess you just gotta see things from a different perspective~ yea, to those that are still waiting for prince charming, good luck~! :)

i m so not gonna wait for prince charming, cuz' he is probably too lazy to get his ass up to come sweep me off my feet; instead, i shall wait for my knight in shining armor to come take me away and fulfil my dreams, he has not arrive cuz' he might have took a wrong turn somewhere and is too stuborn to ask for help in directions~ ;) i m waiting for you he knight in shining armour~ :P

so yea, i might sound dumb/silly/idiotic to some of you, but yea, thats what i wanna say~ currently still in the #foreveralone mood though~ >n<

bunch of mother-farkers

yes, this is a rant-y, n yes, i do not like to blog using my comp because i feel that i have no privacy... but still, i think i gotta need to suck it up until i can get my own comp [which is like after i get into either a jc or poly T.T] but anyways, today, friday the 13th, is really not a good day for me :( not bad luck or anything, but just that it is a day that alot of idiots piss me off  >:( some are just plain clue-less while others are just plain stupid  >< so this post is gonna get bitch-y and filled with vulgarities... i m so pissed now that i don't have the mood to censor them off... :<

i didn't think too much about what i m writing so sorry if i have stupid mistakes... so it all started when i reach home... around 3 in the afternoon; my dad was outside shifting his plants and blah blah blah... suppose to be his hobby... o.o but anyways, i kept on helping out in the housework side, cny coming and my mum wants me clean together, so yea, being a good kid and filial daughter, i did. after that, when i finished and went into my room to rest, my dad came in right on cue and reprimanded me for slacking when there are other things to do. EH, HELLO! YOU WERE OUTSIDE THE WHOLE TIME I WAS HELPING AND ALL YOU DID WAS WHAT YOU LIKE LEHH, I WAS CLEANING. BY RGHT, I DID MORE WORK THAN YOU LAA, STFU GTFO! FUCK, THAT WAS SOMETHING THAT REALLY PISS ME OFF. everytime me, my mum, my sis and my bro will be the ones doing all the housework while my dad always slack somewere like a boss, after that still complain here complain there... eh, got problem then do it yourself laa, stop being lazy and make others do the work for you can or not?

after that, he shut-ed up when i was slacking... when i just sat down on the comp, barely even started to use it; here comes the magical phrase: 'mag uhh, can help me with this?' darling mummy, thank you so much. i went over to help her change the sofa cover and when i merely commented on my dad's ablity to do almost everything just with his eye power and voice, my dad, who obviously noted the heavy sacarsm in my comment, just told me off, saying that he have alot of other more important things to do~ ok, can. aiya, then later what he do, he stand aside and just use his phone like a BOSS. ok, he can say he planning to ask my relatives over to my house for reunion dinner, but i obviously despised that ridiculous idea since my dad's side the relatives all pocess the RIDICULOUS ABLILITY TO ARRIVE AT LEAST 1 HOUR LATER THAN THE SUPPOSED MEETING TIME, eh, no noe teach you all manners uhh? what happened to your most basic sense of urgentcy?! my whole family must wait for you all dumb-asses to come before we can start eating huh?! fuck, i m so not gonna put up with all your damn shit ashole attitute and excuses liek how you wasn't able to get ready on time and what nots. we meeting at 6 in the EVENING lehh, not MORNING, don't need you to get your cheepo asses up early to come my house to eat lehh. still can be so late huhh? then next time don't come laa, i put up with all of your asses because i give my parents face horh, not because you damn dua pai, don't push the limit laa. bitch please, i can tell easily why you always choose my house as a gathering palce, especially when it comes to family dinners, because it is expensive to host mahh, so make my parents the host, you all just come and eat, no fuss. your kids dirty the place you also don't need to clean up, got my mum's kind heart, ask me to clean up instead. -.-

yes, my dad has 3 other siblings, he is the oldest and his youngest sis, in my damn opinion, is always the one that i want to kick most, i do agree that my uncle do not have the ability to host the reunion in his house because he was only married for less than 5 years, my other aunt and her husband both stay with her husband's parents, hence, unable to host the reunion there. the youngest aunt, on the other hand, deccides that my house is the best because:
1) my dad will make my whole family clean up the whole house before they come
2) my mum do not really mind to help host them
3) i can be the best maid that does chores without complain because i don't want my mum to tire herself (no, i m not trying to brag)
so yea, there you have it, best reasons, oh i forgot to mention, my house is obviously bigger and neater. ok, win liao. -.- anyways, i m just super pissed laa, can rant out somewhere totally makes me feel better... if you managed to read till here, i thank you very muh uhh~ :) btw, i know i digress alot, but basically, this is all rants, dont take it too seriously~

random pic of today: